Tommy Dorfman is “thrilled to reintroduce myself as the woman i am today.”
The 13 Reasons Why actress took to Instagram to announce she is transgender with pronouns she/her,
She opened up about her journey in a new Time magazine article, clarifying that she is not “coming out” but rather “reintroducing” herself to the world.
“It’s funny to think about coming out, because I haven’t gone anywhere. I view today as a reintroduction to me as a woman, having made a transition medically,” she told the magazine. “Coming out is always viewed as this grand reveal, but I was never not out. Today is about clarity: I am a trans woman. My pronouns are she/her. My name is Tommy.”
“I’ve been living in this other version of coming out where I don’t feel safe enough to talk about it, so I just do it. But I recognize that transitioning is beautiful. Why not let the world see what that looks like?” she shared. “So I kept, on Instagram, a diaristic time capsule instead—one that shows a body living in a more fluid space. However, I’ve learned as a public-facing person that my refusal to clarify can strip me of the freedom to control my own narrative.”
“With this medical transition, there has been discourse about my body, and it began to feel overwhelming. So, recently I looked to examples of others who have come out as trans. There’s the version I couldn’t really afford to do, which is to disappear for two years and come back with a new name, new face and new body. But that’s not what I wanted,” Tommy continued.
She also made clear that “I’m not changing my name,” opening up about its poignant origins.
“I’m named after my mom’s brother who passed a month after I was born, and I feel very connected to that name, to an uncle who held me as he was dying,” she explained. “This is an evolution of Tommy. I’m becoming more Tommy.”
As for her career, she revealed she already booked her first role as a woman last year, thanks to Lena Dunham.
“I’m thinking about how I can infuse my trans body into film and television. Lena Dunham gave me my first role as a girl last year—it was so exciting and validating,” Tommy said.
She also shared how her transition has impacted her relationship with husband Peter Zurkuhlen, whom she married in 2016.
“And personally, it’s wild to be 29 and going through puberty again,” she revealed. “Some days I feel like I’m 14. As a result of that shift, the types of romantic partnerships I seek out are different.”
“I was in a nine-year relationship in which I was thought of as a more male-bodied person, with a gay man,” she added. “I love him so much, but we’ve been learning that as a trans woman, what I’m interested in is not necessarily reflected in a gay man. So we’ve had incredible conversations to redefine our relationship as friends. Transitioning has been liberating and clarifying.”
